How Russia Changed My Life

When I was 14 years old and living in Garland, TX, my dad lost his job and began working in Siberia.  He would go there for 6 weeks and come home for 6 weeks.  It was a terrible time for our family.  So, after doing that for a while, my dad was able to find a contract job in a part of Russia where we could join him- Moscow.  I grew up in Texas and lived there for nearly my first 15 years, so when my parents told me we were moving to Russia in 6 weeks, it was not happy news.  I never considered my mom's perspective, not until many years later, and I think it was probably many times harder for her than it was for the 4 children she brought along with her to join my father, who went ahead of us.  But, at the time, all I could think about was how my life was over.  I had planned everything and "they" had ruined everything.  They were taking away my chance to go to High School, to be on the debate team, marching band, school plays, girls' camp, and a climate that I considered to be heavenly. I went to the same elementary school from K-6 and the same Junior High for 7th and 8th and had a great group of friends.  I had my path charted and it had just drastically changed.  At the time, I couldn't see how any blessings would come from it.  But, I was wrong, of course.  I didn't know yet that trials and challenges always present opportunity for growth, increased faith, and even blessings.  I didn't know yet that Russia would change my life in a way that I would never want to go back and change. 

How can I really describe to someone who hasn't experience this, what it was that was so profound about moving to a foreign country in the midst of adolescence?  I don't know, but I'm going to try.  Imagine your life as it is and then something happens that opens up a whole new dimension of awareness, like in The Wizard of Oz when the movie switches from black and white to color.  All of the sudden you realize that there is a perspective that you weren't even aware of, and how did you not know it existed before? This is what Russia did for me.

I lived in an American bubble. I took my life for granted because I didn't know any different.  I grew up in the middle class.  We had challenges and we couldn't afford anything and everything, but my parents gave us a good life.  There were times that were harder than others, but there was never a day in my life that I woke up wondering if I would have a place to sleep or healthy food to eat.  I never questioned my ability to go to college or where the money came from for piano lessons.  I enjoyed the mail system, the stores, the weather, transportation, education, and many other things, but I didn't cherish them. 

We were not poor in Russia, but money cannot buy things that aren't for sale.  At first, I learned that a different country meant different food.  I yearned for American foods like peanut butter and root beer.  I daydreamed with fond memories of late nights watching T.G.I.F on T.V. eating Reeses Peanut Butter Cups and Chicken n' a Biscuit crackers.  But, all of my favorite snack foods were NO WHERE TO BE FOUND!!!!  Three weeks after arriving in Moscow, we celebrated my 15th birthday with a storebought cake that was a nasty concoction of marshmallow and cardboard like cake material.  The ice cream we found turned out to be frozen meat filled pasta.  It was a low point.  We tried to be happy while we took our turns with the 3 sets of utensils and chairs, but I was pretty unhappy. My parents had ruined my birthday and my life.  Birthdays meant ice cream and friends and I didn't get either one of them.  It took me a while to stop griping and realize the gifts I was getting.

Russia taught me to be grateful for everything. Here are some things I am grateful for directly because of what I learned there:
1. Grocery stores where you can buy your meats, dairy, produce, and all other food at the same place and only have to stand in one line.  And a cart is provided for you to use!
2. The U.S. mail system.
3. Toilet paper- the soft fluffy white kind
4. Being in control of my heater and air conditioning
5. having air conditioning
6. Roads that are maintained
7. Drivers who try to follow the rules of the road
8.  white mayo, as opposed to green mayo
9. Being able to attend church in my native tongue
10. The church house being around the corner, and not an hour away by smelly public transportation
11. clean air
12. safe neighborhoods
13. religious freedom
14. spacious homes
15. democracy

It's more than all of that though.  I just came to realize, eventually, how lucky I am to be an American.  I learned that people are different and that it's okay.  I learned that I determined my happiness, whether I was at a pool in Texas or throwing snowballs off the 10th floor balcony in Moscow.  In the orphanages, holding the malnorished, uncuddled babies, my eyes were opened to true need in the world. I gained a depth of appreciation and a stronger sense of my place in the world.  It's strange, but leaving everything I knew and going somewhere totally different and definitely difficult helped me learn that  I leave a very small thumbprint on this huge world, but that I matter, and that everyone matters.  I learned so many things in Russia.  It just changed me.  Do I ever want to live there again? Um, no, not really. But, would I ever undo the three years I spent in the former Soviet Union. No.  I don't think I'd like the person that I would be.