Saturday, May 14, 2011
Dear Mother Nature,
My garden is in, and I have just one request. Could you find the compassion in your cold cold heart to keep the weather above freezing from now until October? Pretty pretty please with sugar on top? It's been a long day. I got up at 6:30, late for me, but I thought it was 7:30 so I hurried out of bed. I went to get my two wonderful Bountiful Baskets and then hurried to watch my sons play a really long soccer game. When I came home, my awesome neighbor offered me a truck full of sand for free. I don't have anywhere prepared for it, but my driveway had an available spot and I couldn't turn down free sand, free memories for my children, free gritty happy messiness, could I? I loved my sandbox growing up, at least until the day I found my missing pet rabbit buried in the sand. But, before that, I loved it. I loved it so much, it was worth spending 3 hours unloading that sand onto the driveway and it will be worth all the rest of the work to make it a home. Anyway, you don't really care about that, being a fictional force of nature, but I can say what I want because this is my blog. So, in between a birthday party and a pinewood derby car weigh in, and 3 little neighbor girls playing over here for a few hours ( they were so well behaved), my husband and I each made trips to nurseries to buy flowers and vegetables for our garden. I threw together a quick dinner. And then we planted. I think I spent about 4 hours planting. And all I'm really asking is that all my hard work doesn't get obliterated in a freak storm that doesn't belong in the month of May. I know I am being reasonable. Can you be reasonable too? We have ENOUGH snow in the mountains and we don't need or want any more in the valleys. Keep your freezes to yourself and leave my tomatoes, peppers, asparagus, cabbage, swiss chard,cucumbers, broccoli, butternut squash, zuchinni, crook neck squash, and EVERYTHING else ALONE. Thank you!
Friday, May 13, 2011
Little Shark, Little Shark. Emmeline is 1!!!!!!
One year ago, on a rainy day in May, Emmeline started her journey into the world. My labor was very long, which is usually unusual for me. After all, my last labor had lasted 39 minutes from the first indication of anything and consisted of roughly 8 contractions. This time was different. I went in to see my midwife for my 39 week appointment and found out I was 6 cm dilated. I had gone on my daily 3 mile walk that morning and felt light contractions throughout, which continued the entire day. Membrane stripping and cohosh didn't really kick it into high gear. I just kept having easy contractions. Over the next 15 hours my cervix effaced fully and the baby's head descended as far as it could while I stayed 6 cm dilated. It turns out I had an amniotic sac of steel. It was bulging out and effectively stalling any more cervical dilation. It actually bent my midwife's hook when she tried to break my water. She was successful on the second try and 20 minutes later, Emmeline Adelle Pitts, aka Little Shark, Lemon, or Lemon Lime, swam up out of a seriously awesome birthing tub and greeted her grateful parents. We'll never forget our surprise at her copious amounts of sun kissed looking hair. Fast forward 12 months.
Despite one terrifying trip to the E.R. and numerous unplanned "trips" down the stairs, Emmeline has made it to her first birthday! Hooray! We are so in love with this little girl. In just 12 months, she has gone from an adorable newborn lump baby to a talking, eating, singing, playing, walking rascal. Emmeline loves belonging to a big family. Who wouldn't like being hugged, kissed, and adored by multiple people throughout the day?
Here is an update about the most important aspects of Emmeline's life:
Sleeping- Sleeping is for babies. Emmeline is a baby. Emmeline needs to sleep. She doesn't quite grasp this simple yet profoundly true logic, but she is doing okay in the sleep department. She sleeps from about 9-7 and takes one to two naps every day. Sometimes she goes down like a lamb to the slaughter and other times she goes down like a cat taking a bath.
Eating- Food, glorious food! This baby can eat! Emmeline loves just about everything we put in front of her. She has never had the "pleasure" of eating from a jar of baby food or drinking from a bottle, but always gets to eat whatever we are eating. When she was six months old, there was a new recommendation for feeding babies, overturning the "rules" that had been in place for about 25 years. The new rules- Babies can eat just about everything once they turn 6 months old, including nuts, as long as allergies do not run in the family. Well, they don't run in my family, so this little kiddo has been eating everything except for honey for the last 6 months. If you ask her if she wants ice cream, she gets a silly excited grin on her face. She is really looking forward to smearing cake all over her face tonight.
Playing- Is there anything better in life than having your job description include "play all day"? I doubt it. Emmeline is doing well at her job and will continue in her current assignment for a few more years. Some of her favorite activities are 1) getting in the way of whatever the big kids are playing with 2)unloading the ziploc bags 3)crawling a few feet up the slide and getting pushed down by whichever older sibling comes down next and 4) playing the piano and dancing
Talking- This little girl is a jibber jabber maniac! Emmeline is all about making noise and being heard. The screams that come out of her body are shocking. They just don't sound like something that should come out of such a little person. When she isn't screeching, she likes to used civilized forms of communication. Her current vocabulary includes- Mommy, MahMaw( Grandma), Daddy, up, baby, yah( yes), nigh nigh, bye, and hi. She has said a few words one time, like Reuben, Clara, Audrey, and redonkulous. Okay, she didn't say redonkulous.
Walking- It was bound to happen. I knew it would happen. And, it did, in fact, really truly, no kidding, actually happen. Emmeline can walk. She took her first steps a couple of weeks ago and she is practicing constantly. She loves to stand up in the middle of the floor with nothing to hold onto and then take a couple of steps before sitting back down. She has a much greater walking ability than she realizes, so will only take a few steps unassisted, but she loves to just stand around. Emmeline digs her little toes down into the floor to try and maintain her balance. It's really adorable!
We have loved watching Emmeline learn all these new things over the last year. She is pure joy. We love her from the tips of her soft wavy hair to the bottoms of her tickly toes. We love her scrunchy happy nose and her giggly gapped toothy smile. We love the feel of her, small and warm, cuddling in for some love or comfort. We love the sparkle of happiness in her eyes when one of us picks her up. We love her ambitious spirit and the way she fits into our family as the Pitts family caboose. Happy Birthday Emmeline!
Emmeline greatly enjoyed her birthday. She spoke a new word,"out", had her first ring pop, and took one hour to eat her cake and ice cream. Her homemade caterpillar cake wasn't fancy, but it was sooo tasty. smothered in real whipped cream.
Despite one terrifying trip to the E.R. and numerous unplanned "trips" down the stairs, Emmeline has made it to her first birthday! Hooray! We are so in love with this little girl. In just 12 months, she has gone from an adorable newborn lump baby to a talking, eating, singing, playing, walking rascal. Emmeline loves belonging to a big family. Who wouldn't like being hugged, kissed, and adored by multiple people throughout the day?
Here is an update about the most important aspects of Emmeline's life:
Sleeping- Sleeping is for babies. Emmeline is a baby. Emmeline needs to sleep. She doesn't quite grasp this simple yet profoundly true logic, but she is doing okay in the sleep department. She sleeps from about 9-7 and takes one to two naps every day. Sometimes she goes down like a lamb to the slaughter and other times she goes down like a cat taking a bath.
Eating- Food, glorious food! This baby can eat! Emmeline loves just about everything we put in front of her. She has never had the "pleasure" of eating from a jar of baby food or drinking from a bottle, but always gets to eat whatever we are eating. When she was six months old, there was a new recommendation for feeding babies, overturning the "rules" that had been in place for about 25 years. The new rules- Babies can eat just about everything once they turn 6 months old, including nuts, as long as allergies do not run in the family. Well, they don't run in my family, so this little kiddo has been eating everything except for honey for the last 6 months. If you ask her if she wants ice cream, she gets a silly excited grin on her face. She is really looking forward to smearing cake all over her face tonight.
Playing- Is there anything better in life than having your job description include "play all day"? I doubt it. Emmeline is doing well at her job and will continue in her current assignment for a few more years. Some of her favorite activities are 1) getting in the way of whatever the big kids are playing with 2)unloading the ziploc bags 3)crawling a few feet up the slide and getting pushed down by whichever older sibling comes down next and 4) playing the piano and dancing
Talking- This little girl is a jibber jabber maniac! Emmeline is all about making noise and being heard. The screams that come out of her body are shocking. They just don't sound like something that should come out of such a little person. When she isn't screeching, she likes to used civilized forms of communication. Her current vocabulary includes- Mommy, MahMaw( Grandma), Daddy, up, baby, yah( yes), nigh nigh, bye, and hi. She has said a few words one time, like Reuben, Clara, Audrey, and redonkulous. Okay, she didn't say redonkulous.
Walking- It was bound to happen. I knew it would happen. And, it did, in fact, really truly, no kidding, actually happen. Emmeline can walk. She took her first steps a couple of weeks ago and she is practicing constantly. She loves to stand up in the middle of the floor with nothing to hold onto and then take a couple of steps before sitting back down. She has a much greater walking ability than she realizes, so will only take a few steps unassisted, but she loves to just stand around. Emmeline digs her little toes down into the floor to try and maintain her balance. It's really adorable!
We have loved watching Emmeline learn all these new things over the last year. She is pure joy. We love her from the tips of her soft wavy hair to the bottoms of her tickly toes. We love her scrunchy happy nose and her giggly gapped toothy smile. We love the feel of her, small and warm, cuddling in for some love or comfort. We love the sparkle of happiness in her eyes when one of us picks her up. We love her ambitious spirit and the way she fits into our family as the Pitts family caboose. Happy Birthday Emmeline!
Emmeline greatly enjoyed her birthday. She spoke a new word,"out", had her first ring pop, and took one hour to eat her cake and ice cream. Her homemade caterpillar cake wasn't fancy, but it was sooo tasty. smothered in real whipped cream.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Long Suffering
I know that I don't really know serious suffering, when compared with what I see other people going through. I have never had a close relative die, not yet anyway. I know that is inevitable, unless I die first, but I haven't experience it yet. All of my children are relatively healthy. I've never been homeless. I've never been hungry, except by choice. My hometown hasn't been destroyed by a tsunami or an earthquake. I'm not waiting to find out if my family died in a tornado. Nobody in my family has cancer. I mean, I know how truly blessed I am and how many terrible horrible bad and really truly awful things could happen to my family that haven't- yet. I have had some trials and bouts of suffering that were hard for me to bear, things like terrible morning sickness, being poor, living away from family, parenting challenges, marriage issues, and health challenges. Some of the things I've been through are too personal to share with most people and others might look at me and my life and think that I don't know true suffering. I probably do that to other people too. I try not to. The more trials I get to experience, the more I understand that just about everyone is going through something that is really hard for them. It may not be something that will cause death or a permanently affect life, but it is still hard. So, while I qualified this post at the beginning by saying that I don't "know serious suffering", I don't really think that is true for most people by the end of life. And it isn't true of me. Everyone has troubles and everyone has blessings. I have experienced trials that I never thought I would be able to bear, trials I can't imagine volunteering to go through, trials that gave me the opportunity to strip down my life and my heart to the most basic components and rely on my Savior Jesus Christ and the power of the atonement to pull me through. While, I never would have picked some of my trials, I am so grateful for the things I learned in dealing with them. It's one thing to believe in the atonement and it's another to use it in every aspect possible- to repent, to find a way to forgive, and to heal a hurting heart. It is real.
I am so grateful that I got to know the atonement in a very personal way years ago before getting my current trial. I've complained about it a ton, so most people know that I have trouble with my mouth. Just over a year ago I started to have pain in one of my molars when I chewed on it. I went in to the dentist and had an xray and exam and he couldn't find anything wrong. He told me to try sensitive toothpaste and I did with no relief. 2 months later I gave birth to Emmeline and was busily immersed in caring for her. When she was a couple of weeks old, my tooth broke while eating a bowl of chili. I was pretty horrified because this had never happened to me before and I'm really upset whenever I have to get a filling. It has something to do with a part of my tooth being drilled away and being gone FOREVER. I worry that I won't have any teeth left by the time I'm 50 and I'll have to get dentures or implants. My tooth just randomly breaking off sent me into a physical mode of panic. I was hyperventilating. It freaked me out in a big way. I went in for an emergency filling because it was a Saturday. I thought my troubles were over, but they were just beginning. After the filling, I didn't chew on that tooth for a couple of weeks. It wasn't the same as before. It was shorter and it felt funny. But, I finally decided to trust it and chew on it and everything was going fine for a week or so, until the 4th of July breakfast for Judd's parents' ward. My tooth was suddenly sensitive to cold. I went back into the dentist and he told me to try sensitive toothpaste again. Over the next week I developed pain in my chewing muscles and my teeth all started to hurt. My top teeth felt like they were being squeezed together and they started to hit my bottom teeth when I talked. All of my teeth hurt. My top teeth started to move a tiny bit when I ate food or talked or touched them and I can hear this little click. It's really gross and upsetting. Sometimes it happens and sometimes it doesn't. Nobody knows why.
I went back into the dentist. He put me on motrin for two weeks to try and reduce inflammation. That didn't work. He made me a small mouth guard. That didn't work. I went to another dentist for another opinion. He wanted to equilibrate my teeth ( shave them here and there to improve my bite) and make me another mouth guard and give me a crown- for $2,500. I went back to my dentist. I think I went to my dentist 8 or 9 times last summer. He referred me to a jaw specialist who told me my bite is terrible and that I'm grinding and clenching and that I need braces and physical therapy. I was pretty happy about that. It seemed right to me. I could feel that my bite was wrong. It used to feel fine, but somehow it became so very wrong. Throughout all of this, my symptoms never went away, but sometimes got a little better and other times were so bad that it became really difficult to be nice to people. I went to an orthodontist for a consultation. He said I needed jaw surgery because my palate needs to be expanded. Because I am an adult and have a fused palate, it must be done surgically. That was in October of last year. I also went to see the P.T. She helped me learn a lot about jaw problems- specifically TMJ. I don't actually have TMJ, because I don't have any deterioration of my jaw joint, but I have similar problems. I learned how to sleep correctly, how to talk correctly, how to stand correctly, how to relax when I feel my jaw tightening, how to be careful and protect my jaw from hyper extending my ligaments that are weak and like to move in ways that they shouldn't. Who knew that being able to bend my pinkies completely backwards is a bad thing? Anyway, that was helpful, but when I went to see the oral surgeon, everything came crashing down. The surgery, which is completely scary to me and involves actually cutting all my teeth off and apart and then pinning me back together, costs $10,000. The braces are $5,000. At this point, I had paid over $1,000 just to try and find out what was wrong with me. We have one child in braces and one with a palatal expander. Two of our kids have glasses and need them replaced twice a year or more because their eyes are changing so quickly. They don't have insurance for those things. I don't have any insurance at all- long story, but I'm uninsurable. The oral surgeon doesn't take payments. And I don't have $10,000, or even enough extra money to put it on a 0% interest credit card for a year and pay it off, at the same time as paying for the braces, which must go on for 6 months before the surgery. I feel very strongly, after much prayer and several priesthood blessings, that I am supposed to get the braces and the surgery. It's been 7 months since I found out I needed them and I haven't done anything. Well, except live in pain every single day. Some or all of my teeth hurt all the time. I get sores from rubbing against the mouth guard. The muscle pain comes and goes and I keep on massaging and practicing deep breathing. It isn't as bad as it was at first because I've learned some things to help me not make things worse, like NEVER letting my teeth touch EVER. But, sometimes they do. My jaw muscles are whacked and my teeth smack together with no warning when I am talking. It hurts a little at first and then it hurts more later for a long time. I still wear my little mouth guard and I chatter my teeth against it at night without meaning to. In the morning sometimes my teeth vibrate like a wind up toy I have another tooth that is going crazy with sensitivity, even though I've been using sensitive toothpaste for a year. It just hurts for no good reason. It was getting better, but now it's getting worse again.
I dream of a day when I won't think about my teeth once during that day. I dream of a day where I can eat crunchy or hard food again, or ever just chew normally, where I don't bite my cheeks in my sleep and get sores, where I can talk without it feeling like my mouth and lips belong to an alien. I dream of owning my mouth again and loving my mouth again and my muscles calming down and my teeth aligning properly. I don't know when I will get the braces. I wanted to wait until my baby was older and she is getting older now. We had to wait to try and save some money, and we are still working on that. $15,000 is a lot of money. So, this is my trial that is teaching me a little bit about long suffering, or suffering for a long time. It's teaching me about patience. It is increasing my empathy for the suffering of others. It is helping me to curb bad habits like talking too much and biting my fingernails. It even helped me lose the baby weight. There are always blessings mixed in with the trials. Always. I do not know how or when this pain will end, or even if it will. But I do know that with God nothing is impossible and that I will either be healed or I will be given the strength I need to suffer with patience. Part of me wishes I were strong enough to never talk about, to never complain. Another part of me believes people should be more open about trials and let others in instead of pretending everything is okay. I learn from the strength and examples of those who suffer long. I watch my neighbor who needs a wheelchair to get around. He has a disease that will kill him eventually. But, he doesn't let it keep him down. Last week he came over with his daughter and got on his hands and knees in my parking strip and taught me, and helped me pull up a long section of grass. His arms are really strong. His spirit is even stronger. I guess that is the goal in the end, to overcome the physical body, whatever maladies befall us, and to find a way for our true selves, our spiritual selves, to rise above the physical and become something wonderful in spite of it. Part of the blessing of the physical body is problems that come with it and teach us things we can't learn any other way, many times at price that is too painful to be willing to pay, but that we pay anyway because we have no choice. I know this is really long and rambling. Sorry. Usually, I write things like this in my personal journal and I don't worry about how long it is. Maybe it's a little preachy too. I'm not going for that. I know I have a ton more living and learning to do. I just wanted to share this slice of my life. Maybe it will help someone. Maybe nobody is ever going to read this, but maybe someone will read it who is having a completely different but completely overwhelming trial, and it will help. Maybe I will read this again in 5 years and it will help me. If my mouth is still hurting in 5 years, I'll need it! And if my house burns down, I want this to float around in cyberspace so I can always find it. I'm feeling like this is really cheesy right now and the temptation to just erase it is getting strong, but I'm going to resist. I know to a lot of people the pain I am suffering is something they would gladly trade their suffering for, and I wouldn't blame them. I wouldn't trade with the 29 year old mother of 5 with stage 3 breast cancer. I wouldn't trade with my poor mother, afflicted with so many physical ailments we are calling her Jobette. I'm not trying to say I'm going through something so intensely horrible that nobody has ever suffered this much and nobody could understand. I know others have suffered this much and more, and I know that Jesus Christ understands. It's so humbling to me, so hard to comprehend how He bore all of our pain and suffering. Yet, I know that He did and that He does understand and lift me up. And I know that when the harder things come in my life, some of those really awful things like death, cancer, or who knows what, that He will see me through them too.
I am so grateful that I got to know the atonement in a very personal way years ago before getting my current trial. I've complained about it a ton, so most people know that I have trouble with my mouth. Just over a year ago I started to have pain in one of my molars when I chewed on it. I went in to the dentist and had an xray and exam and he couldn't find anything wrong. He told me to try sensitive toothpaste and I did with no relief. 2 months later I gave birth to Emmeline and was busily immersed in caring for her. When she was a couple of weeks old, my tooth broke while eating a bowl of chili. I was pretty horrified because this had never happened to me before and I'm really upset whenever I have to get a filling. It has something to do with a part of my tooth being drilled away and being gone FOREVER. I worry that I won't have any teeth left by the time I'm 50 and I'll have to get dentures or implants. My tooth just randomly breaking off sent me into a physical mode of panic. I was hyperventilating. It freaked me out in a big way. I went in for an emergency filling because it was a Saturday. I thought my troubles were over, but they were just beginning. After the filling, I didn't chew on that tooth for a couple of weeks. It wasn't the same as before. It was shorter and it felt funny. But, I finally decided to trust it and chew on it and everything was going fine for a week or so, until the 4th of July breakfast for Judd's parents' ward. My tooth was suddenly sensitive to cold. I went back into the dentist and he told me to try sensitive toothpaste again. Over the next week I developed pain in my chewing muscles and my teeth all started to hurt. My top teeth felt like they were being squeezed together and they started to hit my bottom teeth when I talked. All of my teeth hurt. My top teeth started to move a tiny bit when I ate food or talked or touched them and I can hear this little click. It's really gross and upsetting. Sometimes it happens and sometimes it doesn't. Nobody knows why.
I went back into the dentist. He put me on motrin for two weeks to try and reduce inflammation. That didn't work. He made me a small mouth guard. That didn't work. I went to another dentist for another opinion. He wanted to equilibrate my teeth ( shave them here and there to improve my bite) and make me another mouth guard and give me a crown- for $2,500. I went back to my dentist. I think I went to my dentist 8 or 9 times last summer. He referred me to a jaw specialist who told me my bite is terrible and that I'm grinding and clenching and that I need braces and physical therapy. I was pretty happy about that. It seemed right to me. I could feel that my bite was wrong. It used to feel fine, but somehow it became so very wrong. Throughout all of this, my symptoms never went away, but sometimes got a little better and other times were so bad that it became really difficult to be nice to people. I went to an orthodontist for a consultation. He said I needed jaw surgery because my palate needs to be expanded. Because I am an adult and have a fused palate, it must be done surgically. That was in October of last year. I also went to see the P.T. She helped me learn a lot about jaw problems- specifically TMJ. I don't actually have TMJ, because I don't have any deterioration of my jaw joint, but I have similar problems. I learned how to sleep correctly, how to talk correctly, how to stand correctly, how to relax when I feel my jaw tightening, how to be careful and protect my jaw from hyper extending my ligaments that are weak and like to move in ways that they shouldn't. Who knew that being able to bend my pinkies completely backwards is a bad thing? Anyway, that was helpful, but when I went to see the oral surgeon, everything came crashing down. The surgery, which is completely scary to me and involves actually cutting all my teeth off and apart and then pinning me back together, costs $10,000. The braces are $5,000. At this point, I had paid over $1,000 just to try and find out what was wrong with me. We have one child in braces and one with a palatal expander. Two of our kids have glasses and need them replaced twice a year or more because their eyes are changing so quickly. They don't have insurance for those things. I don't have any insurance at all- long story, but I'm uninsurable. The oral surgeon doesn't take payments. And I don't have $10,000, or even enough extra money to put it on a 0% interest credit card for a year and pay it off, at the same time as paying for the braces, which must go on for 6 months before the surgery. I feel very strongly, after much prayer and several priesthood blessings, that I am supposed to get the braces and the surgery. It's been 7 months since I found out I needed them and I haven't done anything. Well, except live in pain every single day. Some or all of my teeth hurt all the time. I get sores from rubbing against the mouth guard. The muscle pain comes and goes and I keep on massaging and practicing deep breathing. It isn't as bad as it was at first because I've learned some things to help me not make things worse, like NEVER letting my teeth touch EVER. But, sometimes they do. My jaw muscles are whacked and my teeth smack together with no warning when I am talking. It hurts a little at first and then it hurts more later for a long time. I still wear my little mouth guard and I chatter my teeth against it at night without meaning to. In the morning sometimes my teeth vibrate like a wind up toy I have another tooth that is going crazy with sensitivity, even though I've been using sensitive toothpaste for a year. It just hurts for no good reason. It was getting better, but now it's getting worse again.
I dream of a day when I won't think about my teeth once during that day. I dream of a day where I can eat crunchy or hard food again, or ever just chew normally, where I don't bite my cheeks in my sleep and get sores, where I can talk without it feeling like my mouth and lips belong to an alien. I dream of owning my mouth again and loving my mouth again and my muscles calming down and my teeth aligning properly. I don't know when I will get the braces. I wanted to wait until my baby was older and she is getting older now. We had to wait to try and save some money, and we are still working on that. $15,000 is a lot of money. So, this is my trial that is teaching me a little bit about long suffering, or suffering for a long time. It's teaching me about patience. It is increasing my empathy for the suffering of others. It is helping me to curb bad habits like talking too much and biting my fingernails. It even helped me lose the baby weight. There are always blessings mixed in with the trials. Always. I do not know how or when this pain will end, or even if it will. But I do know that with God nothing is impossible and that I will either be healed or I will be given the strength I need to suffer with patience. Part of me wishes I were strong enough to never talk about, to never complain. Another part of me believes people should be more open about trials and let others in instead of pretending everything is okay. I learn from the strength and examples of those who suffer long. I watch my neighbor who needs a wheelchair to get around. He has a disease that will kill him eventually. But, he doesn't let it keep him down. Last week he came over with his daughter and got on his hands and knees in my parking strip and taught me, and helped me pull up a long section of grass. His arms are really strong. His spirit is even stronger. I guess that is the goal in the end, to overcome the physical body, whatever maladies befall us, and to find a way for our true selves, our spiritual selves, to rise above the physical and become something wonderful in spite of it. Part of the blessing of the physical body is problems that come with it and teach us things we can't learn any other way, many times at price that is too painful to be willing to pay, but that we pay anyway because we have no choice. I know this is really long and rambling. Sorry. Usually, I write things like this in my personal journal and I don't worry about how long it is. Maybe it's a little preachy too. I'm not going for that. I know I have a ton more living and learning to do. I just wanted to share this slice of my life. Maybe it will help someone. Maybe nobody is ever going to read this, but maybe someone will read it who is having a completely different but completely overwhelming trial, and it will help. Maybe I will read this again in 5 years and it will help me. If my mouth is still hurting in 5 years, I'll need it! And if my house burns down, I want this to float around in cyberspace so I can always find it. I'm feeling like this is really cheesy right now and the temptation to just erase it is getting strong, but I'm going to resist. I know to a lot of people the pain I am suffering is something they would gladly trade their suffering for, and I wouldn't blame them. I wouldn't trade with the 29 year old mother of 5 with stage 3 breast cancer. I wouldn't trade with my poor mother, afflicted with so many physical ailments we are calling her Jobette. I'm not trying to say I'm going through something so intensely horrible that nobody has ever suffered this much and nobody could understand. I know others have suffered this much and more, and I know that Jesus Christ understands. It's so humbling to me, so hard to comprehend how He bore all of our pain and suffering. Yet, I know that He did and that He does understand and lift me up. And I know that when the harder things come in my life, some of those really awful things like death, cancer, or who knows what, that He will see me through them too.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Gluttons for. . . .
A couple of months ago my husband practically begged a member of ther bishopric to ask us to sing in sacrament meeting. He won't verify my take on things, but I'm pretty sure that is how it happened. I was okay with it. We like to sing together. We both have tolerable voices and his tenor melody abilities go nicely with my alto harmony. Then he told me the date was April 24th, as in EASTER Sunday. "Yea!" I thought. Okay, not really. My thoughts were more along the lines of, "Double dog dang! Do we really have to sing on Easter?" Some of those thoughts might have been voiced to my husband. He didn't agree with my idea of asking to sing a different day, so we set about picking a suitable song. It needed to come from the hymn book or the Primary Children's Songbook and it needed to somewhat address the topic of Easter. And it needed to be an arrangement or I was going to be bored out of my brain. Luckily, some of my favorite composers, the Beebe's, have written an arrangement of "I Know that My Redeemer Lives" that fit the bill. But I couldn't be satisfied with just me and Judd singing. Oh no! I wanted the whole family. My thinking was that even if we sounded bad, people would think the kids were cute no matter what. The only problem was that the song was pretty challenging and fairly long. So, we got busy. I spent time with each child seperately learning the song, either as an alto or a soprano. Clara (5) and Audrey (3) had to memorize it because they cannot read. We broke out into little solos and duets throughout the song and everyone had to remember when to sing and when not to sing. Reuben and I had to learn an incredibly difficult 8 measures. We are both really good at reading music but this was just impressively difficult and we had to bribe ourselves with a prize and play it over and over and over and over and over until we got it right. When everyone had learned their parts, we came together, over and over and over again, to practice it all together. And again and again and again. Every time we practiced it took 10 minutes to get everyone to stand still and stop talking, hitting, insulting, crying, moping. . . whatevering, long enough so that we could practice. The children also thought it important to critique each other during the song practice. We NEVER actually went through the entire song at home without someone talking and stomping away mad or refusing to sing. It was super fun! We never practiced at the church with the microphone. We ran through it one time with our talented accompanist at our house last night. Walking away, moping, and refusing to sing may or may not have occured during that practice. So, I was a little nervous about how things were going to go today. But, I hoped the kids would put out their best efforts for "THE REAL DEAL" And they did, and then some. They all sang their little hearts out and sounded really sweet, at least to me, and I think to some other people as well. I did see a few people wiping away tears. I think they felt the spirit, unless those were tears of actual pain :). At the very end of the song is a really beautiful part where we break off into two parts and repeat the words "I know that my Redeemer lives." It's slow and soft and just really pretty and the kids did great at following me. I've waited 12 years to have a big enough family with enough ability to be able to pull something like that off, and it was a sweet moment. Maybe in a couple of years we can do it again and include Emmeline. But, until then, I'll borrow the words of Clara, who grabbed the mike away from Judd at the end of the song and proclaimed," Goodbye, everyone!" Happy Easter!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZP5qUX8zCg this was our last practice. It was better at church because we used two microphones and nobody insulted anyone or pouted or thought about beating anyone.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Cheap Skates
| Pre-teenagers are hard to understand. For evidence, I offer the child who wore shorts and a puffy vest at the same time. |
| Clara is pretty fast with this little walker. She often convinces complete strangers to push her around. |
| Timothy really loves ice skating. He's my buddy on the rink and cheers me on because I can skate "so fast"! |
| Strolling on ice is so much fun. The other stroller contains Audrey. She is terrified of skating still. |
| I offer this photo of my foot as unclear evidence that I also skated. |
My cheapness extends beyond $1.99 or less per pound of boneless skinless chicken breast,no, it is not just skin deep. My cheapness hits where it really hurts- entertainment. I can count on one hand the number of times we have paid to go to the first run theatre since we got married. My idea of good fun is free fun. But, this isn't always possible, so I'm always on the hunt for cheap fun, for the deal that is too good to be true but actually is true. And we have just such a deal right here in our very own Salt Lake County. It's called the Utah Olympic Oval. Yes, I said Olympic, as in THE OLYMPICS. The 2002 Olympics that happened right here in Utah. This facility is awesome!
Here's a link:http://www.olyparks.com/uoo/index.asp
I only got to go ice skating a few times in my first 15 years of life. The price where I grew up in Dallas, Tx, was about $7. That was a lot of money in the 80's and 90's and more money than my parents spent on activities most of the time. With 6 kids, that would have been a pretty pricey two hours and I think my mom made the better choice buying season passes to Six Flags Over Texas. Back then they were around $50 a person and she took us at least once a week all summer. That was also back when summer lasted a full three months. I can't get going on that topic, or I might lose my focus. Anyway, I only went a few times. That is, until we moved to one of the coldest places in the world- Moscow, Russia. All of a sudden we could do almost anything we wanted. With the value of the dollar we could go to the Bolshoi Theatre for a dollar or two. Ice skating was so cheap it was insignificant. And if we didn't want to pay anything at all, we had a pond within walking distance that was free. So, my parents bought me some Russian ice skates for under $20 and I had my chance over the next 3 winters to skate to my hearts' content. There wasn't much else for me to do, with no t.v., no internet, no cell phones, no ipads, no blackberries, no high school, no mall. . .We made our own fun. And we had fun!
Okay, now fast forward to adulthood and the Olympic Oval. It is one of the few truly fabulous deals out there right now. If you pay to skate one time it will cost you $6. This is a pretty good deal considering what I paid 20 years ago to skate. But, if you buy a family pass, you pay $99 for one year. $99. As in ninety nine dollars!!!!!!! Not even one hundred. So, that's a marketing ploy, but who cares. It includes skate rental. This is seriously cheap skating! And I haven't even told you the coolest part yet. You didn't see that one coming did you? The ice skating rink is a 400 m oval. Inside of the oval are two smaller rinks. One of them is for hockey games and for public skating during the summer months. The other one is for figure skating. Surrounding the oval is a running track, which is included in our membership. And the biggest and bestest part is that strollers are allowed on the ice, so I can go ice skating without my husband but with my little ones who cannot ice skate and I get to skate too! You can even bring a double stroller on if you want to. They have little walkers for beginning skaters and helmets for anyone who wants one, all included as part of the membership or admission. For $99 a year, for up to 6 people, but kids under 4 are free, so my family of 8 was still $99. And if you have a bigger family, it is only $10 more per person. We had a pass a couple of years ago and loved it and we bought another one at the beginning of the Christmas break. I've taken the kids about 10 times in 3 1/2 months. Following this trend and taking breaks into account, we will probably go 25-30 times during our year of membership. If we all go 25 times, it would be about $4 each time, or fifty cents per person. That is good exercise, good fun, and Cheap Skates. You would think with this great deal that it would be so crowded as to be miserable, but it isn't. Sometimes the lines can be a little bit long to get your skates if a youth group comes, but there's always plenty of room on the ice and the track. If you haven't checked it out yet you should. We'd be happy to meet you there!
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Emmeline is 11 months old!
| I found my card reader. Here is a current photo. Emmeline LOVES playing the piano! |
The biggest development this last month has been Emmeline's vocabulary. She loves to talk and mimic what we say. She has said up, happy, Mama, Dada, baba, brother, Clara, Audrey, bye bye, and hi. She claps and waves constantly and blows kisses and gives kisses. But her kisses are only for me and they are nice and juicy. Mmm, yummy- baby slobber! She has also discovered the wonder of her own hair, which is 5-6 inches long now, and really fun for her to twirl while nursing.
Emmeline is the mini ruler of our house. When the big kids come home, she is the first one they want to see. I might as well be a mushy dog gift in the grass for all the attention I get. But, that's okay. I don't blame them, and I probably do the same thing. I can't help it! She 's so cute! It's impossible not to love this baby.
She is working on using utensils. Right now they are really fun to hold and wiggle and throw overboard. She is also hoping that I will give up my quest to keep her out of the toilet. I've never had a kid play in the toilet before, so I needed one to help me learn patience in that area.
| Emmeline is a couple of weeks old in this photo. |
| Every kid needs a funny bath picture posted on the internet. |
Monday, March 14, 2011
Emmeline is 10 months old!
With only two months to go before her sisters stop declaring her age to be "Zero!",I think that Emmeline is going to survive her first year. She has made some important progress this last month. The most important change is that Emmeline no longer wants to choke to death. Yes, I actually typed that- IT'S A MIRACLE!!!! She has started to look at me when she puts things in her mouth. And if I say,"Emmeline, give it to Mommy" SHE GIVES IT TO ME! AND SHE DOESN'T CRY IF I TAKE IT AWAY. So you can see how this is truly a miracle, considering all the things this kid has attempted to swallow, or actually swallowed. If you don't know what I'm talking about, refer to my post about Emmeline being 9 months old.
We have been getting good use out of the "cage" aka really big play yard that Grandma Dellory bought for us. Emmeline tolerates it very well if a friend comes in to play with her. Yes, it dominates my entire living room, but I don't care because Emmeline's newest goal in life is to fall down the stairs. Yep, she fell down the stairs this last month. We have a permanent baby gate at the top of the stairs in our family room, but we struggle with keeping it closed all the way- thank you older children. It was not properly latched one day and the baby took a tumble down a long steep staircase and landed in a basket of clean laundry. She was fine. We are working really hard to teach her to go down the stairs safely. She has mastered climbing up the stairs, yet another reason we are grateful for the play pen.
Emmeline has been busy improving her other skills as well. She loves to wave hello and goodbye, cruise around the furniture, babble with an array of wonderful consonants, point to her teeth and tongue, and blow kisses. After having strange looking blisters on her top gums for what seemed like FOREVER, her top teeth have broken through . She is pretty excited about what this means for her eating future. Emmeline has tried a lot of new food and nearly reached Baby Nirvana at Souper Salad last week. She ate garbanzo beans, turkey, peas, corn, cottage cheese, peaches, strawberries, garlic bread, mushrooms, and pudding. I think that's all, but there could have been more. She was one happy baby! She loves everything she eats, whether it is oatmeal, asparagus, avocado, corn, pork roast, bread, potatoes, cereal, bananas, yogurt, cheese, crackers, green beans. . . .you get the picture.
She has also become better friends with her crib the last few days. She's taking naps again. I doubt I have to elaborate on how much of a relief that is for me. And last night, she went to bed without crying! That was normal before she learned to pull up and stand, but seemed to get put on hold for a month of teething So, I'm hoping it sticks because Judd is getting kind of tired of the late night movie marathons to get her to fall asleep.
Other than those minor sleeping woes, Emmeline has been a pure delight to us. She is happy. Amy describes her as "jolly". She is fun to snuggle, fun to tickle, fun to hold, fun to feed, and fun to love. And when, at times, I start to feel overwhelmed with the persistent pain in my mouth/teeth/jaw muscles, nothing lowers my anxiety better than cuddling or nursing my sweet baby. She never "asks" to nurse, but when I offer she gets so excited and crawls over at super baby speed and either says" baba", which is our word for nursing, or clicks her tongue on the roof of her mouth. She's just so dang cute! Happy 10 months Emmeline!
We have been getting good use out of the "cage" aka really big play yard that Grandma Dellory bought for us. Emmeline tolerates it very well if a friend comes in to play with her. Yes, it dominates my entire living room, but I don't care because Emmeline's newest goal in life is to fall down the stairs. Yep, she fell down the stairs this last month. We have a permanent baby gate at the top of the stairs in our family room, but we struggle with keeping it closed all the way- thank you older children. It was not properly latched one day and the baby took a tumble down a long steep staircase and landed in a basket of clean laundry. She was fine. We are working really hard to teach her to go down the stairs safely. She has mastered climbing up the stairs, yet another reason we are grateful for the play pen.
| Feed me Mommy! This is the happy face of a baby at an all you can eat buffet. |
| More food, less photos |
She has also become better friends with her crib the last few days. She's taking naps again. I doubt I have to elaborate on how much of a relief that is for me. And last night, she went to bed without crying! That was normal before she learned to pull up and stand, but seemed to get put on hold for a month of teething So, I'm hoping it sticks because Judd is getting kind of tired of the late night movie marathons to get her to fall asleep.
Other than those minor sleeping woes, Emmeline has been a pure delight to us. She is happy. Amy describes her as "jolly". She is fun to snuggle, fun to tickle, fun to hold, fun to feed, and fun to love. And when, at times, I start to feel overwhelmed with the persistent pain in my mouth/teeth/jaw muscles, nothing lowers my anxiety better than cuddling or nursing my sweet baby. She never "asks" to nurse, but when I offer she gets so excited and crawls over at super baby speed and either says" baba", which is our word for nursing, or clicks her tongue on the roof of her mouth. She's just so dang cute! Happy 10 months Emmeline!
| The "cage" |
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)